Following on from my informative and educational post ‘The easy way to distress furniture’, I thought it would be helpful to share my secrets on how to Captivate Clients. We all know just how important it is to give the right impression; to give your business a certain kudos and to make a name for oneself.

A little while ago, I painted a couple of chairs and an occasional table. The pieces of furniture were to go in the shop window of a new venture, a posh vintage shop in Yorkshire. The pieces looked good when finished and yes, I was chuffed, so duly strutted about, fluffing my feathers and generally boring everyone to death casually letting slip that MY work was going to be the centre of attention in a new shop window. (I’m not sure the Jehova’s Witnesses or double glazing salesman wanted to hear about it, but what the heck).

I imagined exquisite, antique lace garments draped seductively over the edge of the chairs and then worried that the lace garments might just obscure my masterpieces too much. I made a mental note, to draft a contract for the clients, one that stipulated 80% of the chairs MUST be visible at all times. And then I made another mental note, this time to ensure the contract included a term that the table must be dead centre in the window, not pushed to the side, EVER.  Not even at Christmas, when the clients might have silly ideas about making way for festive decorations. 

I digress… The customers were driving over to pick up the furniture and I made sure that I wasn’t wearing the jeans with the rip across the bum wasn’t too scruffy. I even managed to wear mascara! However, I couldn’t stand on ceremony all day, as I only had a vague idea of when they’d arrive, so had to push on with some work. I was halfway through sanding back the top of a table when the customers arrived, so I quickly fluffed my feathers (again) and swaggered over went to meet them.

I could immediately tell that the customers were truly entranced and captivated by my obvious talent. They stared intently at me as I spoke about my work; they looked completely hypnotized by my charm and charisma (Well, if you’ve got it, flaunt it, thought I). So flaunt it I did and they remained mesmerized; couldn’t take their eyes off me in fact. I waxed lyrical, basking in the glory of it all.

After a few moments, my husband came out to say hello to the clients. He took one look at me and said “You’ve got a really black moustache!” “Have I?” said I, looking at my customers, who just fell about laughing hysterically. It would seem that the sanding back of dark oak, when clients are due, might not be one of my best ideas! I did hastily explain that the moustache wasn’t a permanent fixture, and I was actually quite normal, but I’m not sure they believed me.

So, there you have it – if you want to captivate your clients, get a moustache. They’ll never forget you, that’s for sure.